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:iconadonael: More from Adonael


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Poetry by BonesBleachedBare

Daily Deviations by thorns

Literature by Dream-on-Dreamer


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Submitted on
August 1, 2012
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When was the last time
You heard the word 'erection' in poetry?
I think it was a while back
Between the pages
Of reform
And Odyssey.

I mean "humans" don't even play
Bogies anymore,
Or just rise to the thirteen year old tree-house
Inside us all
Where politeness is a foul facade
And we aren't afraid of our fingers.

No...
Instead
We prioritise the silhouettes
And forget
The way pressing pen into paper
Made us so
Steamy
And out of
Breath.

Inspiration isn't a pretty, pristine river...
It's magma
Flowing
With taboo,
Glowing
Like irradiated
Lemonade
And it's about time we became
Mutants too.

It's about time
We let up
And let it
Burn us up
Turn us on
Turn us up
And fine-tune
Our wobbly bits
Into an aphrodisiac
Viagra fusion
Of concussive
Corrosive
Verbose
Sex.

So if there's any P.S.
Poetry can teach you
It's this.

Never forget
the word 'erection'.
I had no idea how unfinished this was when I first posted it, but I think I've written it the way it deserved to be written.

Enjoy.

And remember the word.

EDIT
Sorry I reuploaded it for those who had read and commented. The computer had a moment of crazy. It is practically a brand new piece though so...:shrug:

EDIT EDIT
Wow...thank you for the DD. I've just literally had to walk around my house from the shock of it, but I'm being melodramatic and I'm calm now so...yes...thank you :)
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Daily Deviation

Given 2012-08-05
The nature of inspiration by ~Adonael ( Suggested by my-soul-is-mine and Featured by thorns )
:iconbatmanwithbunnyears:
BatmanWithBunnyEars Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2013   General Artist
:iconcongratsddplz: I like the free-form jazzy rhythm of the piece, how it speeds up in the middle and slows down just at the end for emphasis.
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you. I knew I'd done something right when I found myself remembering it word for word without the need for paper.
Reply
:iconlottie-girl:
Lottie-Girl Featured By Owner Dec 14, 2012  Student General Artist
I think you may have told me about your DD, though I'm not too sure, old age and all that jazz makes me forgetful. So Congrats!! :D

I love this. It reminds me of all the lecture I've been having on authenticity and it's significance.

Well written and powerful.

:D
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Dec 23, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I may have showed off about it at some point ;)

I'm very humbled that it reminded you of such a lecture - makes me feel like I've found my style with a poem like this one, you know?? :3

Thank you :iconsuperheroglompplz:
Reply
:iconlottie-girl:
Lottie-Girl Featured By Owner Dec 23, 2012  Student General Artist
You're very welcome :D
And I'm glad :D
Reply
:iconniky28:
Niky28 Featured By Owner Aug 13, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
wow :D congrats for the DD :D
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you :D
Reply
:iconniky28:
Niky28 Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
you're welcome! ^^
Reply
:iconshadowphoenix-916:
ShadowPhoenix-916 Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Your PS was awesome! Away with flowery words; sometimes its what's real and raw and dirty that's beautiful
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
That's exactly what I was going for - sometimes we have to be brave and ambitious - even more so than this poem actually.

And thank you. I appreciate the comment :)
Reply
:iconmondofly:
MondoFly Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012  Student Writer
I love this. It has a grand point and is just...an awesome reminder.
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you. I'm a tad speechless, but thank you :)
Reply
:iconoviedomedina:
oviedomedina Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012
Excellent!
Thanks for the originality!
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! And you're welcome.

But I'm sure you'll easily be able to make some of your own, yes?? :)
Reply
:iconoviedomedina:
oviedomedina Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012
No problem!
Yeah...as soon Ive got that little thing they call "free time" :(
and learn how to figure how to upload stuff up here!
Thanks for the encouragement tho!
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
No worries :)

Ah free time...the elusive myth :/
Reply
:iconwhocares967:
WhoCares967 Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
congrats on the DD :D this makes me want to go make something so creative and passionate! litterally my blood pumped faster just from reading that!
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! :D

There's no greater honour I feel than when my work inspires others to go and writiply! If you do make something from this, please link it to me :)
Reply
:iconwhocares967:
WhoCares967 Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
will do :D and thank u for the llama badge!
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
No worries :D
Reply
:iconkarinta:
Karinta Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012  Student General Artist
This is wonderful!
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Why thank you -bows- :)
Reply
:iconaeire:
Aeire Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012
Irradiated lemonade! XD but I like it! Most people think I'm crazy when I try to explain inspiration, but you...you get it! :D
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I'm glad that you feel that way. There's nothing better when you someone feels like a piece of work truly speaks to them.

Thank you. And I thought the irradiated lemonade was quite silly of me but admittedly I liked it too XD
Reply
:iconaeire:
Aeire Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2012
:hug: you are an awesome person.

And silly things are usually some of the best :3 (coughlikemecoughcough what you heard nothing xD)
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 10, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Why thank you :tighthug:

I do like silly things. That sounds like a terrible cough you have there ;)
Reply
:iconaeire:
Aeire Featured By Owner Aug 12, 2012
:icongwompplz:

Silly things :iconlikeabossplz: yes, it is XD I shall attempt to rid myself of it, but you know how these things are x3
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
That is the most adorable glomp I have ever seen xD

:gwompplz:
Reply
:iconaeire:
Aeire Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2012
i love it too xD
Reply
:iconlalaith913:
lalaith913 Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012   Writer
The rhythm you've gave this is really what makes it. Awesome piece!
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Why thank you :D
Reply
:icontenor27:
tenor27 Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012
Reminds me of 'The Eve of St. Agnes' when Porphyro 'arose' at the sight of Madeline. Or some of Yeats' later stuff. Dang, poetry can be erotic.
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Wise words xD

Admittedly I've never read Yeats...save the odd poem, but it's still at a point where his work hasn't stuck.

But the 'Eve of St Agnes' - I remember looking at that poem and thinking the same thing at the word 'arose'.
Reply
:iconimagineapplescruffs:
ImagineAppleScruffs Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Wonderful work! I love it! :love: I know how it feels to have inspiration push you on like jet fuel in your veins, moving your fingers across the keyboard or pulling your pen along paper so quickly that your writing can't keep up with your thoughts. It's also wonderful when things just seem to write themselves.
Congrats on the well-deserved DD! :clap:

:peace:
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Jet fuel in your veins...that's a brilliant way of describing the feeling.

Thank you. It's great knowing you enjoyed it :)
Reply
:iconimagineapplescruffs:
ImagineAppleScruffs Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:XD:

You're welcome. Keep up the good work. :)

:peace:
Reply
:iconilaezha:
Ilaezha Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012  Student Digital Artist
WOW. My mouth was open for most of this. The imagery is perfect, and it is so true; you are a great poet.
If you don't mind, I'd like to copy this down and hang it in my room.
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
...I suppose that's one reaction I haven't had yet, but I'm pleased to hear that :P

You flatter me, but thank you and I would be honoured if you did, granted that you credit my work of course.

But formalities aside, I hope that it leads you to one day having someone hanging your work on their bedroom wall :)
Reply
:iconilaezha:
Ilaezha Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012  Student Digital Artist
haha, Well you are welcome. I will definitely put your name on the page!

And thank you. :) Best of luck with your work as well! :heart:
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you :)

All the best with your work :tighthug:
Reply
:iconilaezha:
Ilaezha Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012  Student Digital Artist
And, of course, congratulations on the DD. :)
Reply
:iconbillabong2011:
billabong2011 Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012
Congrats on the DD, I absolutely love this!!! <3
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you -bows-
Reply
:iconeuxiom:
Euxiom Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012
Ahaha, wow. This is fantastic! I potisively love how you made the magma and irradiated lemonade analogies. And the rhyming! Super big congrats on the DD!
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I personally enjoyed the lemonade image myself. I just liked how it depicted the magama metaphor.

Thank you very much!
Reply
:iconeuxiom:
Euxiom Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012
:D You're welcome!
Reply
:iconkaitforest:
KaitForest Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012   Writer
And forget
The way pressing pen into paper
Made us so
Steamy
And out of
Breath.


i love this
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
It's arguably my favourite bit, next to the lemonade analagy :)

Thank you.
Reply
:iconcandrydrops123:
candrydrops123 Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012
even though i find it really weird to read it, but i like it somehow. it is creative and you're a genius!
and because i read this, how could i possibly get this out of my mind. lols
Reply
:iconadonael:
Adonael Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Away with your genius comment. I might blush :P

But seriously, thank you. I'm thrilled that it made such an impact. Looking back, it felt weird writing it, but it felt good too :)
Reply
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